Posted by NAM on Mar 29, 2010 (524 views, 0 comments) Rating: 3.75
"Thank you for joining me for today's brainstorming session," I told the group. "I hope that everyone has helped themselves to the complimentary caffeinated beverages, and high-fructose corn syrup-laden snacks."
"This is a right-proper brainstorming session," Red Sonja said. "First, you've provided everyone with a fantastic grab bag filled with all sorts of antiquated techie handouts you've collected from trade shows, conferences, and conventions over the years."
"I am particularly fond of the Office XP multi-pen," Robert the Bruce said. "And, the Novell NetWare 5 toffee hammer is a whimsical, thoughtful addition."
"And, you brought out the whiteboard easel," Vector pointed out. "Nothing says 'brainstorming' like a whiteboard easel with a selection of different colored dry erase markers. That's like, hardcore, man."
I nodded graciously at the praise. "Now then… to our task. As you know, Microsoft has recently been blazing a trail at the forefront of a new technology it refers to as 'Cloud Computing'. Since we are all in agreement that where Microsoft leads, others will follow, I have called us all together to brainstorm ideas concerning how to take advantage of this amazing new development in modern computing."
The four of us donned our respective thinking caps.
"E-mail," Vector said. "Why not have an e-mail service that people could use with any number of different computing devices, so they could access their e-mail from anywhere, because it would exist… in the Cloud?"
This drew many appreciative comments from the group, and I wrote it on the whiteboard.
"I know!" Sonja said excitedly. "You could have some sort of online application thing that would enable you to create and store documents and spreadsheets, and other people could access these documents and work on them from any computer, anywhere in the world (except maybe China) because all of the documents would live entirely… in the Cloud!"
This was a particularly exciting brainstorm, and I chose a bold blue-colored marker to write it down as the other panel members heaped praise on their colleague.
Robert the Bruce rubbed his beard thoughtfully. "Well, I know this will sound crazy, but-- I've always wanted a personal web page that I could use as a sort of online journal or log, if you will. But, up until now, it's just been too prohibitive to purchase a domain name and buy hosting service and hand code a site. But, what if…"
His voice drew down to an emotional whisper.
"What if, there were a service that offered me a personal web page, without the painfully complex and challenging requirements I have just described? And further, what if this service offered the ability to update my personal page from my laptop whilst in a coffee shop, with connectivity to the Internet as the only necessary condition to be fulfilled? And further yet, what if I could update this web page with text and pictures without having to possess extensive knowledge of HTML and other complicated Web technologies?"
Robert was gripping his Office XP multi-pen so tightly, I thought it would break in two.
"Finally, and perhaps this is the craziest component of the entire utopic notion: what if other people could not only see my web page, but could enter comments on it? What if anyone in the world could interact with my web site, because… dear sweet sleeping Elder Gods… it would exist… IN THE CLOUD!"
These last words were delivered in a roar of heady triumph, the same sort of triumph that Pasteur must have felt when he created the first rabies vaccine, or that Dole felt when he created the first pineapple chunks, or that Kellogg felt the first time he fired a quart of yogurt up a patient's poop chute.
There were raucous cheers from the other people in the room, and I wrote on the whiteboard with tears in my eyes.
Several moments passed while we came back to Earth from the dizzying heights of self-discovery.
"I'm bored," I said. "Let's make fun of something else."
"Fox News?" Vector suggested.
"Too easy," Sonja replied.
"I'll trade someone my SCO novelty eraser for a CramSession personal vanity mirror," Robert offered, digging through his swag bag.
